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I don't agree with manipulative techniques based on NLP (which is what some programs use to try and restore the health of a relationship) but this is a straightforward enough system which relies on your ex's ability to view things from an adult perspective and then make their decisions about what might be best for you and them in terms of a sexual relationship in the future.
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In a Friday column, David Brooks reviews the data presented by the book People who date online are not shallower or vainer than those who don’t. They have access to very little information that can help them judge if they will fall in love with this person.But although we resemble our ancestors and other cultures in our concern about appearance, there is a difference in degree of concern.Advances in technology and in particular the rise of the mass media has caused normal concerns about how we look to become obsessions. 3 reasons: Even very attractive people may not be looking in the mirror out of 'vanity', but out of insecurity.Through apps like OKCupid and Tinder, we’ve learned to emphasize the temporary and the sensually gratifying in our pursuit of love.But enchantment requires us to look beyond ourselves and our temporary desires—it requires us to give up control, or as Brooks puts it, to become “vulnerable.” Part of the reason we love quantification—of our love lives, our vocations, even our pastimes—is because we love having a sense of control, the reassurance of a pleasurable outcome.